I'm So Bummed....

Computer's back up & runnin' (my 2 fans, MeMe & Papa, will be pleased) but I'm so sad to report that Paula Abdul will *not* be performin' live at the Super Bowl pre-game show tonight. So not happy!!!!!

It's pre-taped! I've been ROBBED!!!



Her pill-poppin' ass is the only reason I was tunin' in to the pre-game show. God dammit!!

Ugh! I've been watchin' American Idol this season so far and I swear to the Good Lord above, that bitch ain't been lucid ONE. SINGLE. EPISODE.

Her ass is practically layin' on the table, face-down, as per usual. Why do they put up with her ass? If that was ME, I would've been kicked to the curb a long time ago.

What city were they in when Paula's plane was late? Omaha, I think? Did ya see her f*cked up ass try to walk into the building after her plane landed? Jesus Christ!! She must've thought her plane landed on Mars!! She staggered into that joint like Paris Hilton at the pre-Super Bowl 944 magazine party.

Paula thought she OWNED the place. She couldn't put together a coherent sentence, let alone walk a straight line! I loved it!

Crap. Now, all I have to look forward to tomorrow is gettin' drunk. Oh well.....if I must.

My Favorite Match-Up of the Season

Eli Manning and his New York Giants will brave the elements tonight as they roll into Lambeau Field to take on Brett Favre and the Green Bay Packers.

I think the weather will play a huge factor (for the Giants) in tonight's game. Lambeau is Favre's House and he loves this shit! Eli on the other hand might not be able to shake the puss and pull out a victory.


(Hottest pepaw to play the game)

(The winning team goes to the Super Bowl where Paula Abdul is said to be performing at half-time. Those poor bastards will be in the locker room when that hot mess hits the stage. That's so unfortch! They're gonna miss the performance of a *lifetime*!)

A -13 windchill at kick-off won't bode well for NY tonight. And that's fine with me. I'm pissed at Eli anyway. That bitch didn't do a damn thang for my fantasy team this year and now he's on the cusp of a Super Bowl trip?! I don't think so. Kick his ass, BF!!!

Eli's even makin' his lady freeze her ass off to support him in the stands. That's aiight, I'm sure the thought of spendin' all his money will help keep her warm. That would be my motivation. But I'm a greedy ho. Benjamins'll do that to a gal.



Oh yea, there's another game today, too. Yawn. If anyone cares about Mr. Jiz Bundchen, he hopes to keep his New England Patriots undefeated by disposing of the visiting San Diego Chargers.

They won't have it as bad as the folks at Lambeau, though. It'll feel like a balmy 11 degrees at Gillette Stadium for the 3 p.m. kick-off. Luckies.

Lie To Me! PLEASE PageSix, Lie To Me!

If this actually happens at Super Bowl XLII (Feb. 3), I will denounce the sport forever!

PageSix.com is reportin' that Paula Abdul WILL perform during the half-time show. Holy Mary Mother of God.



And that's not even the worst part of the story. Megan Lynn posts that "Fox will have Ryan Seacrest host the event, interviewing celeb sport fans on a "red carpet," before Paula takes the stage."

Have mercy on my soul.

First of all, football is a manly sport. Fat, sweaty behemoths hittin', kickin' & cussin' one another. And that's just in the stands.

There is no room (I repeat, NO ROOM) for Paula Abdul and MC Skat Kat at the fuckin' Super Bowl! What the hell would this mess sing?! Bitch ain't had a hit record since 1912 or some shit.



Reportedly, she'll be joined by Randy "Welcome To the Dawg Pound, That Was Hot!" Jackson for a rendition of "Dance Like There's No Tomorrow".

If I have to watch that shit, there *will* be no tomorrow for me.

$20 she warbles "Rush, Rush"!! Now THAT's a half-time show, bitches!!!!!