Note To Self:

Don't interrupt filmation of instructional golf videos!

These crazy golf hos don't fuck around!

"Pro golfer" Tripp Isenhour was allegedly tryin' to scare away a protected hawk that was makin' too much noise while he was filmin' an instructional video.

Isenhour took a shot (golf shot, that is) at the bird high up in a tree when he "accidentally" struck & killed it.

Isenhour is now facing criminal charges (of cruelty to animals and killing a migratory bird) for the incident that took place on Dec. 12 in Orlando. He faces up to 14 months in jail and $1,500 in fines.

"About the sixth ball came very near the bird's head, and (Isenhour) was very excited that it was so close," Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission officer Brian Baine wrote in a report.

What a fuckin' bloodthirsty, merciless brute this Isenhour is! Monster!

I sure as hell hope he doesn't have kids. God forbid the chirrens start actin' up while Daddy Dearest is watchin' The Legend of Bagger Vance! I shutter to think what would happen to 'em.

After Isenhour clunked the fowl with his ball from roughly 75 yard away, it fell from the tree, bleeding from both nostrils. The bird was buried at the golf course and later dug up by Florida investigators.

Cover up! Cover up!

Give him the chair, I say!! Fry his ass!!! Turn PETA loose on him for five minutes in a dark room! Where's Bob Barker when ya need him!? Yea, yea, get Bob "The Price Is Wrong, Bitch!" Barker on the case!



(The above is not an image of the actual crime victim.)

R.I.P., poor little birdie. Golf pun not intended.